Adoption: Are we still in this thing?!?
The answer is a resounding yes...finally! You've probably noticed I haven't shared much concerning the adoption recently. That's because there wasn't anything to share...not that there wasn't anything cool and exciting to share...just...nothing to share.
We had been cruising along and even got our home study done in record time, by the end of July. It was then so devastating to hear that there had been an oversight, and we'd have to pause while we went back to two different states for background checks on Chris. It wasn't a huge deal except for the time these checks tend to take, depending on the state.
Let's just say we won't be moving to Virginia any time soon. I bet that's where all Aucilla linebackers go to live. Wait...what...did I just say that out loud? Shame on me. Moving on.
I've heard people that have gone through the adoption process talk about the long delays, but you just don't realize how heartbreaking it truly is...especially when you know how much the children NEED to be placed. It doesn't make sense, and I don't have any profound conclusion that I've come to on this.
It feels like somebody stole your candy...or let the air out of your tires...or popped your balloon. That might be the best analogy...the balloon. Because you feel like you're climbing little by little...getting to the point where you begin to see a bigger picture...you can breathe fresher air...when all of a sudden somebody throws a dart at your smoking' awesome balloon, and it quickly begins to deflate. It makes odd, sometimes terrible, sounds. It seems to be being carried from one random spot to another as it descends. And no matter how hard you pray...no matter how hard you will it to rise again...there's just no possibility it will do so without a massive patch job...if at all.
We've prayed every day for a month that God would continue to keep "C" and "J" safe and healthy until we can bring them home. This wasn't a new prayer...just a more fervently offered one during a frustrating stalemate.
I'm again reminded of pride's ugly cousin, Self-Suffiency. I think on some level...though I'd never admit it or even truly believe this about my own heart...as long as there are tasks to be done, lists to check off, checks to be written, and hoops to jump through...there's a feeling of, "I got this." When in reality, we've never "got this." God's got this. Always has. Always will.
Here's the gut check: if I truly believed all along that God's got this...why the desperation when we could do nothing?
Sadly, I know full well why. Once again, there I was trying to use the very limited knowledge, wisdom, and strength of Eva to get the job done...when the Sovereign One has unlimited knowledge, unfathomable wisdom, and unbeatable strength to accomplish this thing He started in the first place. Grateful beyond words for that truth.
And again, in spite of my shaky ground, God shows Himself faithful.
We received word Monday that the home study was finally completed and was ready to be sent on to the next step. So after checking to make sure all the i's were dotted/t's were crossed, we sent the whole package off to the Feds! (Sorry...was that disrespectful? Was just trying to be cool and clever...which I certainly now am not by having to explain my cleverness...and by using the word "certainly"...but again, moving on...)
We've been told to expect 6-8 months from this point. I sure hope not. I really expected the Lord to bring them home by Christmas...because that would make a wonderful present, I guess....I don't know! And He still could do that...if He chose to! But He also may inject some more of this waiting game to thoroughly get my attention. Whatever...and whenever...that happens, we will be thrilled. 10 years from now, 6 months won't seem like any big deal.
SO...even without a working balloon, I'm looking up...trusting that the Pilot is going to bring us along for the ride...at just the right time.
Just you wait and see what He did today...
Yea...just left you hanging again...
We had been cruising along and even got our home study done in record time, by the end of July. It was then so devastating to hear that there had been an oversight, and we'd have to pause while we went back to two different states for background checks on Chris. It wasn't a huge deal except for the time these checks tend to take, depending on the state.
Let's just say we won't be moving to Virginia any time soon. I bet that's where all Aucilla linebackers go to live. Wait...what...did I just say that out loud? Shame on me. Moving on.
I've heard people that have gone through the adoption process talk about the long delays, but you just don't realize how heartbreaking it truly is...especially when you know how much the children NEED to be placed. It doesn't make sense, and I don't have any profound conclusion that I've come to on this.
It feels like somebody stole your candy...or let the air out of your tires...or popped your balloon. That might be the best analogy...the balloon. Because you feel like you're climbing little by little...getting to the point where you begin to see a bigger picture...you can breathe fresher air...when all of a sudden somebody throws a dart at your smoking' awesome balloon, and it quickly begins to deflate. It makes odd, sometimes terrible, sounds. It seems to be being carried from one random spot to another as it descends. And no matter how hard you pray...no matter how hard you will it to rise again...there's just no possibility it will do so without a massive patch job...if at all.
We've prayed every day for a month that God would continue to keep "C" and "J" safe and healthy until we can bring them home. This wasn't a new prayer...just a more fervently offered one during a frustrating stalemate.
I'm again reminded of pride's ugly cousin, Self-Suffiency. I think on some level...though I'd never admit it or even truly believe this about my own heart...as long as there are tasks to be done, lists to check off, checks to be written, and hoops to jump through...there's a feeling of, "I got this." When in reality, we've never "got this." God's got this. Always has. Always will.
Here's the gut check: if I truly believed all along that God's got this...why the desperation when we could do nothing?
Sadly, I know full well why. Once again, there I was trying to use the very limited knowledge, wisdom, and strength of Eva to get the job done...when the Sovereign One has unlimited knowledge, unfathomable wisdom, and unbeatable strength to accomplish this thing He started in the first place. Grateful beyond words for that truth.
And again, in spite of my shaky ground, God shows Himself faithful.
We received word Monday that the home study was finally completed and was ready to be sent on to the next step. So after checking to make sure all the i's were dotted/t's were crossed, we sent the whole package off to the Feds! (Sorry...was that disrespectful? Was just trying to be cool and clever...which I certainly now am not by having to explain my cleverness...and by using the word "certainly"...but again, moving on...)
We've been told to expect 6-8 months from this point. I sure hope not. I really expected the Lord to bring them home by Christmas...because that would make a wonderful present, I guess....I don't know! And He still could do that...if He chose to! But He also may inject some more of this waiting game to thoroughly get my attention. Whatever...and whenever...that happens, we will be thrilled. 10 years from now, 6 months won't seem like any big deal.
SO...even without a working balloon, I'm looking up...trusting that the Pilot is going to bring us along for the ride...at just the right time.
Just you wait and see what He did today...
Yea...just left you hanging again...
