Zoe-Sightings
Calm down. Step away from the phone. Nobody's calling the men in white coats.
I'm not hallucinating...but I guarantee I've "seen" more of Zoe in these past couple weeks than anybody EVER saw Elvis. Dude...you know who you are...move on people.
Let me explain. In the midst of our heartache and intense sorrow since Zoe's death, we've asked the Lord consistently to allow us just a small peak into what He's accomplishing through Zoe's death. We realize we may never fully understand the impact her death had on those that knew her, but that doesn't stop us from asking. I wanted to share some of those moments with you tonight.
Another reason for this post is that today was one of those "eat-everything-chocolate-in-the-house" days. Yes, it started at Walmart again. What can I tell ya...clearly I spend too much time there. It ended with us stopping by the cemetery briefly as we found ourselves driving right by...it was our first time there since the burial. The filler of my day was equally emotional...hence my need to be reminded of a sovereign God working, specifically through Zoe's death.
A little girl I've never really spoken to much came up to me last week at Bryce's baseball game and asked me, "Why did that girl die?" I fully expected to start sobbing, but God gave grace, and I was able to hold it together. I said, "Well, she was born with a very sick heart, but God kept her alive until we brought her into our family. The doctors tried to help her heart, but they couldn't make it all better. So now she's with Jesus, and it is all better." Maybe it was the innocence of a child...or maybe another miracle...but it was comforting to hear those words coming out of my own mouth, and who knows how He'll use it in her life.
A couple days ago, we took little Zane to see his first movie, Monsters University. (Thought about that whole "trouble sleeping/fears" thing halfway through the movie...nice...we were the family that was ridiculously laughing at all the wrong places as we tried to convince Z that these monsters were just SOOOOO silly!!!! Parents of the year. Follow up: no ill effects noted.) Anyway, as we were getting our loads of popcorn, a man stopped with his son and said, "Hey, I hate to bring up a difficult thing, but did you just lose a daughter?" Good grief...I tell you I had to swallow hard...but again the words just followed, "Yes, we did...that was us." He went on to explain that they were at someone's house from Ty's travel soccer team a few days earlier. He saw they had Zoe's obituary there, and he read the whole thing and has been praying for our family ever since. "I just can't imagine the pain you're going through, but please know that we are praying for you every day!"...a guy I met by the butter.
One of the most exciting things to come from Zoe's funeral was the memorial fund that was established in Zoe's name at Swallow's Nest Home in China. We never could have dreamed or imagined that so many hearts would be led to give in Zoe's honor. To date, more than $3000 has been donated. This is both overwhelming and humbling for Chris and I. We are so thrilled to be apart of what God is so obviously doing through you. It was so exciting to share the news with the home's director, and I wanted to share with you her response! God is so timely with his care for His children.
wow, that's wonderful and we so need it. We have ortho surgery coming up on one boy, undescended testicle on another, club feet on another and reverse colostomy on another......think of you everyday.....
We have literally heard from people all over the world about the impact Zoe's death and her memorial service has had on their own lives, as well as the lives of their church and/or family. You don't even need to ask anymore if you can share our story or blog...please do so...if it can point any one toward Christ and reaching out to those in need, we are all for it.
Roughly a week after Zoe's death, we received the following email from a friend:
I have been praying for your family. Tonight I was visiting with some friends in Iowa City and the wife is a doctor on the floor you all were all on. She did not personally work with Zoe, but everyone knew her and your family. She told me part of the story of how a year ago the staff started talking about her (you informed them possibly they were coming and checking out resources) and waiting for her to come. She also shared that most of the staff there weren't believers (she is) and that your reactions and love and hope was drastically different and has helped some of them question things to hopefully point to God. She shared that you were the second family within the last couple of years to really make a impact on the staff. The other family was also from the Burlington area, and they had lost their son a couple of years ago and were believing Catholics.
We so appreciate every card, every prayer, every text from all of you...but on days like today, I'm even more grateful for the merciful hand of God reaching down to wipe my tears. May you sense His presence as well, and may Zoe's life and death continue to make a unmistakable impact for the Kingdom.
I can't help but imagine our princess sitting on the lap of her Jesus. They sing...they laugh...they give nose kisses...and as she cuddles in close, I can also see Him leaning forward, directly her attention, saying, "Because you're here with me, big things are going to happen, Zoe...Watch closely...I'm going to use BaBa's sermon to help that other Daddy teach his kids about Me...oh look, there's a man that's hearing about me for the first time...your friends from the orphanage are getting the surgery they need...there's your sweet nurse~she's realized she needs to get back in church ever since your sisters were singing to you in the hospital...here's another...and another...this may never end!"
Zoe just giggles...and snuggles back in...she's never been happier.